Caregiver Resources – Write Things Down

For when your mind stops spinning.

New caregivers: Write down the advice you receive – it might come in handy later when you can deal with it!

Write things down.

That’s probably one of the biggest and best pieces of advice I can give any caregiver.

I distinctly remember sitting across from the Head Oncologist of my four-year-old son’s teams (3 groups)  of doctors.  He was an attending physician/professor and coordinated two hospitals treatment protocols in connection with a local university.  Impressive?  All I remembered about him (the preceding information came later) for the first year of treatment was that he was bald and shot words at me like lightningClick here to read more about that!

My mind reeled that first week of diagnosis, days of exams including some pretty horrific-sized needles, some life-saving moments and then launching the treatment protocol.  I remember nurses and doctors advising me to “take care of myself.”  They also offered many phrases into the air while they zipped in and out of our isolated room, scrubbing thoroughly and muttering about This Society or That Resource.  I heard them.

The words were just beyond my grasp.

We floated along in the surreal fuzz that envelops parents of critically ill patients like a shroud.

Children’s Miracle Network was mentioned.

Candlelighters came up.

Make-a-wish foundation, I heard, but given the children on the ward that were getting wishes granted, I assumed it was for the dying.  In the denial stage I was in, it never occurred to me to check into it.  My child couldn’t die…could he?

Ford Family Foundation brochures were in the parent waiting room.

We fought daily for the life of our child.  These phrases continued flying over our heads.

We missed them.

Four years later, my son, with normal hair, energy and health, was watching TV with this wearied mom when something about a kid with leukemia going to DisneyLand through one of the above-mentioned charities.  Why?  Because the kid wished for it.

“Mom!” exclaimed Andrew, “Why don’t I get to go to DisneyLand?  I had leukemia!”

To this day, I don’t have a justifiable answer to that.  It’s simply that I was so overwhelmed with saving my son’s life, I never thought of getting things along the way.  By the time I did, no one was talking about it any more.

Man, I wish I would have written stuff down at his was thrown at me over the top of a mask, across the exam table or waved at us as we exited the hospital.

The resources are there.

Write them down and the next time someone asks you how they can help you?  Hand them the list and have them check into it for you!


Caregiver Spotlight

We hope you click through on some of the links above – these are great resources!


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Find Valuable Resources at Caregiver Connections

Second Wednesday of the Month Highlights Resources

ResourcesResources for Caregivers

During Pedro’s battle with cancer I often felt clueless. For example, I didn’t know that hospitals made arrangements for air ambulances. I didn’t know that the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society gave grants to help family members travel. The one cancer caregiving resource that I knew about (Ronald McDonald House) didn’t help out families of adults with cancer, so I figured we were on our own.

I didn’t realize that massage, aromatherapy, and essential oils could benefit my husband (and ME, a stressed-out caregiver). Caring Bridge? Never heard of it. I do know that I often felt underwater and on the brink of overwhelm.

Maybe you’ve acted as a caregiver for years, or maybe just a season. Maybe you enjoy researching things, or maybe you just feel a desperate need to figure something out. Whatever the case, we can learn from each other. This week’s link up is specifically for blog posts or pages that have useful resources for caregivers.

A ‘useful resource’ would be a post about how you found help from a helping organizaiton or agency (such as the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society). It might include lists of local resources, hotlines, blogs you’ve discovered, or advice. If your caregiving journey has included active patricipation in support groups, share your experience with us!


In order to make this link up user friendly AND pertinent to caregivers and their needs, please make sure that what you link up follows the guidelines for the week. This week is for RESOURCES FOR CAREGIVERS (if your resource has a story wrapped around it, that’s fine). If you aren’t sure if your link is appropriate, feel free to email me at anita at blessedbutstressed dot com and ask!

We will delete links that aren’t on topic in order to keep the link up a true community resource. We WILL contact you first and let you know that we will remove your link. For non-caregiving related links, we invite you to participate in the Inspire Me Monday link up over at

By linking up, you agree to receive weekly reminders about the link up.

Do look for the caregiver boards on Pinterest

Do link up more than one post!

Join our Facebook community, too! It’s easy, just click that button over on the right! —->

Community Spotlight

This week’s spotlight shines on Dr. Michelle Bengtson, a neuropsychologist, writer, and caregiver. She interviewed a dementia caregiver, and in this post, the caregiver shares resources for dementia caregivers. Make sure you check out both the article and Dr. Bengtson’s blog!

Link up Schedule:

1st Wednesday of the month: Caregiver Stories

2nd Wednesday of the month: Resources

3rd Wednesday of the month: Caregiver Self-care

4th Wednesday of the month: Caregiver Encouragement

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